I feel as though I’ve raced ahead a bit telling you how to choose your dream wedding venue. But that’s kinda the point. Bride’s tend to know what we want and, well, sometimes we forget about the good ole Mr Groom. Thing is, he’s quite an important part of the day, and whilst he probably hasn’t been planning the day since he was a nipper, if he’s vaguely metro sexual, or paying towards the day he’ll want some say in matters…and rightly so.
- Guys generally don’t plan these things out in their heads. When I turned up at our wedding venue and they gave me the option to get married outdoors due to an unseasonly hot day in October, I refused. The photographer looked confused. I told him: “I’ve always just imagined it in the ceremony room”. He looked even more confused and confessed men don’t really imagine things like that, I guess they just ‘get on with it’.
- There are going to be some things which he just isn’t going to care about. Chair covers, flowers, place cards. A good Groom will feign interest, but so long as you’re happy – he’s happy. That said. He will tell you if there’s something he particularly wants (a fast car and a roast beef dinner were Mr Love of my Life’s nonnegotiables). He will also tell you if he hates something. Ignore his input at your peril!
When we were planning I sat down with Mr Love of my Life and went through the day from start to finish, telling him how I imagined it to be and asking for his input. We both agreed we wanted something small and intimate, all at the same venue and with the traditional ceremony, sit-down dinner and disco. He looked at me aghast when I suggested some of my DIY ideas. Certainly when I decided to put the meanings of people’s names on the backs of each of the place cards he thought I was bonkers, but it had the desired effect of being a conversation starter and I was pleased I persevered.
So if you’re planning to say ‘I do’ in 2012 (and I know many people who are – yes, that’s you sister-in-law, friend of the family and friend since I was five-years-old!) then I suggest you crack open a bottle of mulled wine over the Christmas break and take some time to talk through what it is you both want from the day. Being able to talk like this is important and sets you in good stead for your future marriage, where you’ll be making lots of decisions together. And remember, at the end of the day chair covers, canapes and church bells don’t matter. The most important thing is that you are marrying the person you love.