It appears resigning from the ‘day job’ has had a more profound effect on me than I first thought. There was me thinking that it was just going to give me the jolt which I needed to find a new way of filling the daily nine-to-five. But, whether it’s because I’ve been lay-on-the-sofa-watching-day-time-TV-ill, or because this has been the wake-up call which I’ve needed for a while – it’s really made me stop and re-evaluate other aspects of my life.
And in the words of the fabulous Mr Williams, I realised…
Momma, things have got to change
No plans, to move to LA, as per Robbie’s fab ‘Hot Fudge’ song (can you tell I’m a fan?! Get well soon Rob! xx), but I have had a bit of a super-star epiphany and I’ve realised that the ‘day job’ has left me so zapped, that I wasn’t just being miserable whilst my nose was applied to the grindstone, but this was also spilling over into those precious hours outside of work. I couldn’t remember the last time when I…
- Called a friend for a chat
- Went out on a weeknight without properly worrying about work the next day
- Cooked a sumptuous meal from scratch
- Baked a cake
- Exercised regularly and felt good about my body
- Took time out to pamper myself
- Worked towards something which was important to me
Between the ‘day job’ and my domestic chores, I’d become a bore, a crap friend, not a brilliant relative, nor a great fiance. My life had become one long ‘to-do list’. Where’s the fun in that?
I looked back and tried to remember the last time I really felt psyched about life and these were the sorts of thoughts which came into my head:
- Shortly after graduating when I was writing for a few websites, trying to get freelance work (as a writer) and doing lots of (unpaid) work experience. There was nothing solid. No security. But a real feeling of opportunity and the ‘world is your oyster’
- Going to the gym regularly and that feeling of being nicely toned and energised
- Cooking delicious meals with Love of my Life, whilst getting a little tipsy on wine, and inevitably ending up dancing around the lounge to old-skool rave
- Entertaining friends and family
And, I thought, as Tim Westwood so eloquently puts it:
You need this in your life
Trying to re-capture my mis-spent youth seemed more mid-life crisis (can I have ‘one-third life crisis’ if I’m hoping to live to 90?!) and so I thought the way to go was a bit of a reinvention. I know this post is full of musical references, but realistically, those in the public eye are the ones who excel at the art of reinvention. Surely Madonna is the queen of this, no? Perhaps that makes Lady GaGa the princess, if this post is anything to go by?
Some would say that reinventing myself when I’m just a few months away from getting hitched is foolish. What if Love of my Life doesn’t like the new me? I would disagree. If anything this is the right time to be doing it. Y’see I want the gorgeous, amazing man, who I cannot wait to marry to have the best wife he can possibly have. I can’t see him arguing with that, can you? Besides, what’s the alternative…